Five-Tastic Blogversary

April 13, 2016: Four-ever and Ever!

“I’d like to say that I’ve changed a lot since starting this blog four years ago, but I haven’t or at least not in a grand dramatic scale. I’m still clumsy, poor at time management, pretty awkward, sleepy, overly-sensitive, and stubborn. It sucks because I’m TOO stubborn to learn from my mistakes the first time, or even the second and third time, it happens. But, I’m slowly, but surely, growing and hopefully, in the future, I become the kind of woman I want to be- strong, smart, independent, kind, and beautiful, above all other things. I’m in this constant state of fluctuating, up and down and up and down, but it’s a way of knowing that I’m trying and I’m changing.

I love this blog. It’s a place where I can pour my heart, thoughts, and feelings out. It’s always there for me- when I’m sad and lonely, when I’m happy and feeling incredible, and when I have the urge to write because of something I realized. I mean, sure, I have wonderful friends and a loving family, but sometimes, they’re not there or they can’t understand. Without this blog, I think I would’ve exploded because of my thoughts a long time ago. I love writing and I love this blog.

What happens from here on out? I don’t know and, although I have no way of knowing what happens in the future, the future I still have ahead of me, I want to keep writing for as long as I live, until my last breath, until my heart’s last beat.

This blog has been keeping me sane for four years and it will continue four-evermore!”

First of all, HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my blog of 5 years and counting! Least to say, life has been a bit more challenging this past year. As an 18 year old, I’m already expected to act more like an adult- more mature, more understanding, more responsible, and the like. I don’t really know how to grow up yet, so it’s really been quite difficult.

I’ve only written 42 blog posts since my last blog anniversary post and that’s a lot lesser than my usual post count. Believe it or not, I wrote 44 blog posts last October 2012. 44 posts within that month. And now I’ve only posted 42 within a year.

I know I don’t write as often as I used to. I don’t write as much as I’d like to either. College has been really hard for me mostly because of my terrible sleeping habit and my horrible time management skills. I never learn from my previous mistakes and I’m still stubborn af.

It’s really hard to admit that little has changed since I made this blog. I thought by this time, I’d have most of my life figured out. I am blessed with so many things- a loving and supportive family, amazing friends, a roof above my head, and a lot more privileges other people could only dream of having. Not to mention that I’m living the dream– studying in my dream university and taking up a major chose. So why am I still lost?

I miss having the time and inspiration to write. I miss being passionate about writing. I miss being able to do my best in everything I do. I really really miss the girl who’s this blog used to belong to. I don’t know how to get her back yet. I don’t even know if I’d ever get her back.

What I am proud of this past year is being able to serve God by being a lector in our church and being able to serve the community by teaching elementary students as part of my NSTP requirement. It’s not much, but I’m glad that even by a bit, I’m able to make a positive impact and I’m proud of that. I’m improving, even by just a notch, and that’s a good enough start.

So, yes, maybe I’m not the same Girl With the Pen that I was before and I might never be her again, but I’m still a work-in-progress- still learning and growing up. I believe that by this time next year, I’d be able to give a better report.

As usual, this post  is kinda messy and I’m still kinda messy, but I’m working on it. I’d also like to take this opportunity to thank all my followers and readers. I know my posts aren’t always uplifting or inspirational, so I thank you for taking the time to read them anyway. I hope some of my posts are able to help you with what you’re going through somehow. Also, check out my book and anime recommendations in the Interests page. I could at least help you through that.

Hopefully, I’ll be able to post more and grow up more this year. I hope all of you are having a great day and, if not, always remember that there’s always something good in every day. Enjoy life and don’t give up, no matter what.

Love, The Girl With The Pen

Blog 1


(Note: Such a messy post huhu. I’m really lost rn with life, but I love life, in general. I’m positive that I can figure things out and get my shit together. It’s Holy Week, so this blog’s birthday is a lot less hectic than last year’s haha. Wishing ya’ll the best!)

My Favorite Things 002

2nd Sem AY 16-17

It’s almost Holy Week and I don’t have classes next week! THE WHOLE FREAKING WEEK! After struggling to survive the previous weeks, next week really seems like paradise. Though I won’t be able to go to Ozine Fest this weekend, I can’t be down on the rut. So, I decided to finally make the second “My Favorite Things” board! It doesn’t have as many stuffs as the first one, probably because I haven’t finished any anime after Bungou Stray Dogs. But anyway, here it goes:

1. W: Two Worlds

I finished this KDrama just 2 weeks ago, so you could say I’m still a bit not over it. It’s the roller coaster kind of drama that keeps you on the edge every episode. Though I wasn’t that hooked by the first episode, the succeeding episodes got me hooked af. It’s a lot more than a romance drama because there’s a lot of action and a pinch of comedy, too.

If you haven’t watched it yet, I definitely recommend that you do. I won’t spoil you on anything, but I think what got me curious about it, besides the very swoon-worthy actor that plays the main character, is that the male character is a character (protagonist, actually) of the manhwa (Korean webtoon) that the female protagonist’s dad writes. THE PROTAGONISTS ARE FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS! So, yes, fantastic plot and great acting! Go watch it!!

2. Omeleto

I discovered Omeleto through Facebook. I was just browsing through my feed and saw a video of theirs that really hit me (the first video here). Then, I visited their Facebook page and watched several other videos. Some videos made me realize things while others made my tear up in public places. In any case, their videos are nothing short of amazing. I think most of them, if not all, are short and simple, so it doesn’t take much of your time. I can’t promise you’d recover quickly though, but still. Try watching the videos above and see for yourself.

3. Toasted Siopao & Lemonade

I decided to include this snack and drink because recently, they’ve been my on-the-go meal and comfort food. Toasted siopao is best when hot and lemonade on a really hot day is just p e r f e c t.

4. Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo

Over Christmas break, I was already seeing stuff about this KDrama in my Facebook feed, but I wasn’t able to start it then. Flash forward to my first day of second sem. I had a 3-hour break because the professor announced that there weren’t going to meet, so I went with my friends to their condominium. They were supposed to watch the fourth episode, but for my sake, we watched the first episode. It was cute and funny. It’s the light kind of drama that makes you have butterflies in your tummy (NOT LITERALLY!). It’s of the romantic comedy genre and the ending is VERY satisfying.

Also, the female and male protagonist are kind of a notch away from the usual kind. Here, the female lead is a weightlifter who eats a lot (F.S.R.N.!!) and very relatable! I admire her for that. On the other hand, the male lead is a swimmer and he’s very childish (sometimes to the point of being sorta annoying). So, yes, it’s really nice and light, so try watching it!

By the way, “do you like Messi?~” HAHAHA

5. Michael Christian Martinez and Yuzuru Hanyu

Michael Martinez SP:

Michael Martinez FS:

Yuzuru Hanyu SP:

Yuzuru Hanyu FP:

I’m still very much into skating, in such a way that I attended the Yuri on Ice convention almost three weeks ago, actually skated four weeks ago, and I’ve been watching skating videos from the recently held Worlds 2017. There’s no question that these two are my favorite skaters. The bias is probably because Michael is a Filipino skater and while watching Yuri on Ice, besides watching Michael’s performances, I also started watching Yuzuru’s. But I am starting to watch other skaters’ performances, like Shoma Uno’s and Evgenia Medvedeva’s.

I would like to give a round of applause to all of the skaters who competed at the World’s cause’ even though I haven’t watched all the videos, qualifying for Worlds and executing such beautiful performances on ice is SERIOUSLY challenging. Balancing on ice is hard enough for me, so HAHAHA. Whether they already qualify for the Winter Olympics 2018 or not, hats off to you wonderful people!

So, going back to my favorite skaters, at the moment, I’ve been watching their videos non-stop. Like, seriously, last week was basically “It’s Holy Week next week”,  “YUZURU  FVBUQQVJBJKJI”, and “MICHAEEEEL WHFUWFHVBCVHQBCFUEUF”. I kinda stalked them a bit and searched a bit more about them over the net, but none of that here haha.

Just adding a few stuff here HAHAHA


So, there ya go haha. My week in a nutshell. Credits to the respective owners of the videos I got from Youtube. The picture of Michael and Yuzuru and Michael’s tweet is from Michael’s twitter. You should check it all out haha. AGAIN, I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE VIDEOS AND PICTURES I’VE INCLUDED HERE IN THIS POST. CREDITS TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS.



Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story~

I am absolutely in love with Hamilton: The Musical and this is one of my favorite songs. Hamilton is a beautiful masterpiece and if you haven’t listened to any of its songs, I definitely recommend that you do. They are all brilliantly written and the performances are spectacular.

I’m not really good at writing reviews, but the reason why I decided to post this is because I wanted to share something I have been hooked to and also because the musical portrays the important and not-so-important figures in history as humans beings, like us. They have strengths, weaknesses, different views, regrets, and the like. They make mistakes, they rise up after falling rock bottom, and the like. But even as flawed human beings, they became part of something huge and, excuse me for the Yuri on Ice reference, made history.

I actually gives me hope that even a human being as seemingly lost as I am can still create something beautiful and worthwhile. As a kid, the highest achievement that I thought I could make was to have my name in a history book and to have students have to remember me, at least for an exam. But now, growing up, the greatest achievement that I aspire for is to make a positive impact on people, to somehow influence their lives for the better. Being remembered, whether it’s while one is alive or dead, is a fantastic thing and I think all of us want to remembered in a certain way. But people ultimately, people will forget. So now, when I’m on my death bed, rather than desperately wanting people to remember me, I want to die peacefully knowing all that I will die with no regrets and that I did all that I possibly can to make the world somehow better.

This post is quite all over the place and I kinda am, too. But I’m a work-in-progress and with God’s graces, I’ll be able to grow and achieve this dream of mine.


(Note: Math exam on Saturday and Engineering Math exam next Monday. I really have to sort things out. I believe I can do this and I really hope that you believe that you can get through whatever you’re struggling with, too. This post might not be as inspirational as I’d like, but I hope it somehow helped you. It’s a beautiful life and though today might not be so good, it’s still a beautiful life.)



Flash Post 013: Say “No” To This!

I’ve done a lot of stupid things in my life, but cramming an academic paper just hours before its deadline is, by far the stupidest thing I’ve done. Unlike my blog posts, writing an academic essay requires an intricate process to be followed. One must have a proposal approved by the professor, a clear and precise thesis statement, an outline of the essay which is used as a guide while writing the essay itself, and then finally, the actual essay-writing. I was given more than two weeks and what did I do?

I crammed it within 12 hours. And it is THE MOST horrible essay I have written my life.

Which is seriously depressing for an aspiring writer such as myself. I’ve always thought that writing is what I’m best at, that it’s my passion in life, in a way. But now..

I don’t know.

Or you know, time management.



Flash Post 012: Sleeping

Ever since I was preschool, I’ve had this horrible habit of sleeping in class. During elementary and high school, it wasn’t that bad. I still caught up with my classes and performed rather well. But now, I fear that it’s getting worse. Not only do I sleep during class, but I also fall asleep while studying at the dormitory. So, now it’s like I don’t even know what to do anymore. I’m having a hard time catching up in class and, with my terrible time management skills, I’m doomed.

And lately I’ve been wondering a bit of what I’m good at. I don’t think I’m that good of a writer and I’m not good in anything else.. so what is there for me? I’m still half-hearted af and I don’t know what to do about that either.

Everything acad-wise seriously sucks right now and I really should be getting my shit together as fast as I can if I want to survive this semester.

BUT in other news, the sun is still up there shining its light to the world and the trees are still grounded and growing and I will get through this.

I watched some stuff in Omeleto  and their videos are inspiring af. I cried a bit and I know I cry easily, but I’m at school and their videos are really amazing and motivating and eye-opening, and the like. So, if you’ve got time, I totally recommend that you watch the videos on their page.

I really don’t know who you are or what you’re going through, but I know that you have a purpose for living and you might not know it yet, but you will someday. Whatever you’re having a hard time with, just keep fighting and you’ll get through it. Never think that you don’t matter because you do. I’m sure there are people out there who love you and who care for you and who will cry their hearts out when you die. I might not be having the best time at school right now, but I know I’ll get through and so will you. You’re a BEAUTIFUL human being and don’t ever think otherwise.

Class in 23 minutes. Bye for now! ❤



Love & Happiness

No matter how difficult this semester seems or how lost I may feel, it’s Valentine’s day, so this day deserves a post!! And, though for the most part it is just a social construct and just another ploy for businesses to earn more money, I’d say it’s a reminder to share the love and happiness all around!

I’ve never been part of any kind of romantic relationship and I’m not sad nor am I ashamed of it. I’m straight and I’ve had crushes, but I’ve never really been “in love”. I’m a hopeless romantic and I love reading and writing stuff from the romance genre, but if there’s anything I’ve learned from reading and from the people around me, it’s that there’s a right time for everything. To emphasize what I’m trying to say, I recommend that you read Lang Leav’s poem, ” Patience”. I’ll try to link/attach it to this post later on haha.

I don’t need to be in a relationship to feel loved. Though I might not have that many friends, the friends I do have are enough. And I don’t think I could have a better family compared to the family I belong to. Yes, we fight A LOT (exhibit A: the fight we had just yesterday) and yes, I feel mad and annoyed at them at times, but they’ve never failed to support me and my dreams. I’m a very stubborn and forgetful and confused person, so I’m thankful that they still love me and that they remind me the things I need to be reminded of.  

I might not be as happy as I want to be, but I still kinda am. I’m a little lost as of now, but I’ll somehow get through it. At these times, I have to remind myself that I’m studying in my dream university and I’m here to create a bright future for me, my family, and my future family. I forget how blessed I am, and sometimes when we feel downtrodden with life, we have to stop for a while and remind ourselves that God has a plan and we just have to strive and do our best.

The point of this post? It’s Valentine’s Day and whether you’re in a relationship or not, it’s a day to love and be loved. You might be going through a rough time right now like I am, so I just wanted to remind you to remind yourself of how blessed you are, of why you’re doing what you’re doing, of the fact that you’re being alive is already beautiful as it is. We’re going to get through this and we’re going to live our lives happily with no regrets because we only get one chance at life.. And that chance is now.

My wish for you this Valentine’s is to feel loved and happy and to share all that love and all that happiness to others, especially those who need it.

Happy Valentine’s!! 💖



Take Me Away~

I actually really don’t know anymore.

I used to be able to fix my life enough for me to think it’s not messed up. I used to be able to feign confidence and get through with whatever. I used to know what I’m doing, more or less. But now, it’s like everything’s crashing down and nothing is going my way and I don’t know what to do anymore.

I know what I love to do, but I also know that I won’t be able to earn much money if I make that my profession. I know what I need to take up to have a not-so-bad career, but I’m not happy with it at the moment. I’m unhappy with having to deal with engineering subjects I barely understand (yes, I’m looking at you, Statics). The course I’m taking up right now is what I need, but it’s also making me unhappy and not being able to act on it is just terrible.

I’m not sure if I’m just lazying around right now or giving up or just confused. I know I’m far from being a professional writer and, right now, I’m also unable to write anything decently. Honestly, I’m just really unhappy and confused with what to do, at the moment.

If I shift to another course now, it would feel as if I’m quitting and giving up. I don’t even know if it’d be alright to shift to a writing or English course because I’m not even that good in those fields and because I know that there’s less money in that.

But it’s what I want to do in life and not being able to pursue a degree in it kinda hurts a bit.

Maybe this is just a bump in the road or maybe I’m not really meant to be taking up an engineering course because it’s not what I’m meant to do in life..?

What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to do?

What am I supposed to do?