Flash Post 042: I’m on top of the world~

Can I just say how great God is and how blessed I am right now? Not only did I get the highest possible grade equivalent in BOTH of my Philosophy classes, but I also got the schedule I wanted for the coming semester. Sure, I still need 1-2 classes, but it is TRULY AMAZING how I still got the classes I wanted given that the odds were against me (probability-wise). PLUS, I got MORE than the score I needed for the removals exam, so GOODBYE STATISTICS!! I know that things won’t always go my way and God ALWAYS has a better plan for me, but I’m just super duper happy that God has graced me with the blessings I want and need for my life. Thank you so much, Lord! You are the best! To God be the glory!!

My fourth(-ish) year in college starts THIS Friday and I don’t think I’ve completely accepted that fact. I mean, I’m enjoying my break right now and I’m pretty okay with school starting, BUT AM I REALLY OKAY? These remaining days are the last of my summer break this year AND I’M TURNING FOURTH YEAR ALREADY!! I’m pretty excited for school, especially since I have the exact same schedule as my college best friend! But am I really ready for what’s to come??

Well, right now, I’m trying to cherish the remaining days of my break by binge watching The Flash ( Season four episodes only until I get up-to-date), probably some Riverdale after, and if I still have time, maybe an Asian drama or two. I also want to finish the book I’ve been reading, The Future of Us, before school starts. Hopefully, I get to meet up with my elementary best friend this week, then there’s the long-awaited hangout with one of my Philosophy classes. OF COURSE I also have to get the 1-2 more classes I need for the semester. So, yes, this week would probably be anything but boring, which is exciting, too, in it’s own ways.

I’m also planning to FINALLY write the My Favorite Things post I’ve been promising to write since June (?). I haven’t gotten into it yet, but I’ve collected a few of the stuff that have become my favorites since after MFT Post. I don’t know when I’ll get to post it, but hopefully it’ll be posted by this week.

Well, that’s that for now. I’m pretty sure I’ll be posting more stuff this week, so till’ next time~!!

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE. MARS.

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Flash Post 041: FrIEday

I have to take a removals exam this Friday for a class I didn’t quite pass (nor fail) last last semester (basically the second semester of my third year). It’s a pass or fail exam – If I pass/fail the exam, I pass/fail the class. When I had learned I had to take the removals exam, I kind of told myself that I’d progressively study for it, but here I am cramming for the exam a few days before, once again.

I find the need to write because I feel super stressed out about it (which could have been avoided, just saying) and I don’t think I can study properly with this kind of mindset. Honestly, the mindset I have right now is the mindset of someone who has already failed an exam she hasn’t even taken yet, who has lost a battle she hasn’t even fought. AND I CANNOT HAVE THAT KIND OF MINDSET, ESPECIALLY RIGHT NOW.

If you’ve been reading my posts (which I don’t really expect you to do), you’d know that I made a pretty huge mistake when I gave up on a certain class last last semester. It was only the second exam and I just gave up entirely. I still attended classes, of course, but I was asleep for most of it and I couldn’t find the motivation to study for it. Obviously, I ended up regretting that decision of mine because now I won’t be graduating on time. There’s no shame in that, really, because I believe that people should go at their own pace and that everyone has their own timeline, but it really could’ve been avoided.

Now, I’ve never passed a single exam in the class I need to take a removals exam for. NOT A SINGLE ONE. But giving up now would not only cause a domino effect in the future (which would only worsen the situation I’m in right now) but it would also mean that I gave up before even trying AGAIN. It would mean that I took the seemingly easier way out now (which would be giving up) to only suffer the probably horrible consequences later on.

I am seriously trying to grasp any sort of motivation right now to motivate me enough to study for my exam. I’m thinking that maybe this will finally be the exam that I will pass in that class. Maybe I can score even higher than the score I need to pass just to prove that I can do more than what’s expected of me. Maybe I’m more than what I give myself credit for. I don’t know.

It’s the end of the post and I’m still really struggling with my mindset. I need to pass this exam, but if I’m going to pass it, I need to believe that I can pass it.

Resulta ng larawan para sa for with god, nothing is impossible

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE

Flash Post 039: Deductively Valid Arguments

It’s 2:40 in the morning and I am once again studying for an exam that I will be taking on the same day. Good morning!

I am surprisingly doing better than I expected in my Philosophy classes. I can still do better than this though. A lot better.

There’s a guy in my Logic class who got perfect scores in the diagnostic exam before our professor taught us anything (about the course) and in the mock exam that we took yesterday. What a dude!

I am writing this post because I need to stay awake until I finish at least till’ my sixth reading, so that I could finish the four remaining readings (all related to each other) in the later (the legit morning that I recognize because right now is just “late-r night”).

Some of my friends are graduating and I’m really really happy for them. Seeing them graduate and succeed makes me feel a messy mix of envy, shock, and admiration. At my current academic standing, it’s almost impossible for me to attain Latin honors when I graduate, but I kind of still want to despite the odds.

I have a midterm exam tomorrow in my logic class (which is the exam that I am currently studying for) and I have to write a midterm paper for my other Philosophy class due Sunday night. For the midterm of a summer term, this is pretty do-able compared to last year (probably because I took Calculus and Sociology last year).

I am still working on my next “My Favorite Things” post and I’m kind of happy that it’ll have a lot of content that I actually really enjoy nowadays when it’s done.

I sometimes wonder why and how I’m such an inefficient person despite being a student taking up a course that stands for efficiency and effectiveness.

I have one serious crush and a few happy crushes. I’m still very much happy with seriously crushing on that one guy though. But it’s also fun having  happy crushes, especially when you have a friend who has the same taste as you and there’s absolutely no awkwardness.

I really need to lose weight because I want to try ice skating again and I gained weight over the past few months. Argh. Also, I want to fit in those pretty dresses on sale that I see whenever I go to the mall.

Why can’t I just be like those people who eat A LOT but never gain any weight/never get fat?

It’s 3:00 and I have to get back to studying. Till’ next time~!!

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE. CHEESE CUPCAKES.

 

 

 

Flash Post 038: “Summer Break”

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I know you probably didn’t because why would you? In any case, I haven’t posted for exactly a month because of a lot of reasons, one of which is because I’m experiencing writer’s block right now. It is very annoying and, most of the time, I question whether or not I’m a writer at all. I mean, I love writing and I have this blog, but does that really make a person a writer or are there some other requirements? I don’t know, but I’m going to write anyway because whether or not I am one, I love writing and I want to keep writing.

My third year of college ended a few weeks ago. I managed to pass all but two of my classes (so that’s basically 4/6 classes passed) – I failed one (as expected, sadly) and I have to take a removals exam for the other. Now, I’ve become a Philosophy major for approximately a month. A friend of mine described this semester as the “Semester of Enlightenment” when I told him about it, but right now, I feel lost during class discussions because I’ve forgotten EVERYTHING I learned from my previous Philosophy class, so I need to review my books and notes to be able to catch up with my classes this semester. BUT I have friends in both of my classes, they’re taught by amazing professors, and I’m really enjoying them, so everything’s well. Last meeting, we discussed about Plato’s Lysis in one of my classes and watched The Giver in my other class. I’m supposed to write a reflection paper about the movie, but I haven’t gathered my thoughts about it yet. I’m probably going to write it later or tomorrow.

This post I’m currently writing is actually one of my “I need to get my shit together” posts because I’m a bit messier than usual since “summer” started. Yes, I’m only taking general elective courses this semester, but I’m still aiming high and I would really love to learn about and understand Philosophy more. Obviously, I can’t slack off. And I have to fulfill org duties and review for the removals I have to take in July. I’m also planning to join a story writing competition with a story I haven’t even actively thought about yet.

And can I just rant about how I’m already twenty for a bit!?!?! It’s only been a few days and I don’t feel as different as I thought I would, but I also thought I’d be a better version of myself by this time, but I’m not. I’m probably as messed up (if not more) than I’ve always been. Although I know that I’m probably not as messed up as I think I am, I also know that I have ways to go before being the person that I am. I’m a work in progress and as long as I keep trying, I know I can be that smart, strong, and independent woman I want to be in the future.

I’m not sure if I was able to write everything I wanted to write about in this post, but I’m glad I was able to write because I haven’t written in a while. Hopefully, I’ll be able to post another “My Favorite Things” post very soon because the last one was about 2 months ago and I think it’s about time for a decent post after a while.

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(I know I’ve posted this .gif before, but it’s kind of one of my favorite cute motivational .gif’s HAHAHA)

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE

 

 

 

 

 

Flash Post 037: The Beginning of The End (of My Third Year in College)

It’s almost finals week!! Well, it’s practically finals week already, but technically, it starts this Friday. I have an approximately 3 exams this week, a paper due tomorrow, and a presentation on Thursday. Basically, it’s almost no different from any other hell week I’ve experienced this semester EXCEPT I actually need to legit more than survive this one because IT’S FINALS AND I NEED TO PASS ALL BUT ONE (I’M SO SORRY! I STILL FEEL SUPER BAD ABOUT THIS BUT I NEED TO PRIORITIZE THE CLASSES THAT I ACTUALLY STILL HAVE A PRETTY GOOD CHANCE AT PASSING) OF MY CLASSES!!!

But first, let me just share the first paragraph of a post I’d written almost (10 days short) 2 years ago:

“Okay, so it’s my finals week this week and I’ve only been reviewing for the exams the night before th actual exams!! I’m so horrible!” -Me, Flash Post 001: My First College All-Nighter

If reviewing for exams the night before the actual exams is so horrible, then I’ve been doing an incredibly horrible job at studying this WHOLE semester, especially during the times when I’d cram weeks-worth of knowledge into one night. Like what I’m doing tonight. HA.

I was supposed to have an exam a while ago, but it was moved on Thursday so YAY FOR ME. Except I kind of put off studying for my exam tomorrow because of said supposed exam a while ago, so there’s that. But it’ll be alright. I just need to not mess up studying tonight.

I’m posting a blog post now because I might not be able to post until after finals week (unless I really feel the urge to do so). I really really really hope (and NEED) to pass all of my classes this semester and figure out how to enlist the major I’m about to fail this semester in my university’s other unit. Lord, please help me!!

And since it’s already the end of this flash post, might as well write that I kind of sort of miss him a bit already even though it’s only been around a month since I got the chance to properly hang out with him again (psssh..). I’ve already sort of kind of accepted that the next time we’d get to properly hang out would be during the next academic year (like how I accepted that I’m gonna fail that one major hahaha sahd), but it’d be nice to see him every now and then this week and the next.

I’m still not (and probably won’t be in the near future) over him. But I’m fine and we’re fine. It’s alright.

FINALS WEEK IS COMING AND MY THIRD YEAR IN COLLEGE IS ALMOST ENDING!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE

Image result for finals week cute gif

 

Flash Post 036: 11 Hours

It’s 3:22 am and I’m currently studying for an exam I have today which will start at 12:30 pm. I’ve already finished two exams this week and this is my last exam for the week, so I’m pretty happy that I’m still relatively alive and sane right now.

Might as well write that I’ve (sort of) given up on this class since before the second long exam WHICH isn’t something ANYONE should do. At that point in time, I still had two long exams and a final exam that could really still boost my grades up. After that, I decided to invest my effort on the classes which I still might have a chance at getting a high grade by the end  of the semester. Long story short, I’ve decided that the class was a lost cause and my performance in that class continued to go downhill from there.

UNTIL last Thursday when my professor told me that I might still have a chance at at least passing the class. I’m not really sure why he’s that optimistic (yes, at least passing is a VERY optimistic thought for someone who’s given up), but I might as well give it a chance and, as my mom would always say, it’s not over till’ it’s over.

How am I cramming WEEKS worth of knowledge and understanding into approximately NINE hours before the exam, well I’m trying to really understand the processes since my professor told me it’s pretty mechanical. Youtube videos of the lessons are very helpful and HOPEFULLY I could give it my best effort, or at least the best effort I could manage at this point in time.

You might be wondering (or not) why I still have the time (and nerve) to write a blog post if I’m super busy studying for the exam, it’s because I need to keep myself awake for the next nine hours (well, 11 hours.. counting the exam.. because I shouldn’t fall asleep.. DURING THE EXAM!) and writing is helping me not only by keeping me awake, but it’s also very enjoyable to be able to express my raw (unprocessed..?) thoughts here again after so long.

And, after all that’s happened, I think I’m back to square five (aka 20% progress). I just don’t see the point of having to make an effort to move on when, after a few clarifications about things, there’s no real reason to do so. It’s true that I’m still (a bit) awkward, that we’re most likely going to be nothing but good friends (hopefully, great friends) in the near (and a bit far) future, and that I still like him, but THAT’S okay and whatever will be will be, I guess. THANKFULLY, it’s still not awkward, in general, and I hope it never does. If you’re reading this (not likely, but still possible), thank you.

It’s 3:52 am and it took me approximately 25 minutes to write this whole thing. Subtracting it from the time I have left to study for my exam, I still have A LOT OF TIME to study!

(Let’s try to be as optimistic as my professor! Yay!!)

Image result for keep moving forward gif

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE

 

 

Flash Post 035: In The Middle (Of The Semester)

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IT’S ALREADY THE 14TH DAY OF THE 3RD MONTH OF THIS YEAR 2018!! And although I’m still a very messy person (both inside and out), I’d still say that I am enjoying the year, so far. Sure, I might not be at the greatest point in my life , in terms of academics, but I’m constantly meeting and hanging out with new friends and I really had fun during last week’s activities (*insert my organization’s name here* WIN!!) so I guess my life isn’t so bad right now.

I’m also already in the middle of the current semester WHICH MEANS I have to start saving my grades in my classes because I don’t want to die again during finals week. I got my Engineering Economics exam (which was the first ever legit exam I took this semester) back yesterday and, to my surprise, I PASSED!! Don’t get me wrong – I didn’t not want to pass, but I wasn’t that confident I’d pass the exam, so I was EXTREMELY happy when I found out I did.

Tomorrow’s the second exam for that class though, so I need to get my shit together and study properly for it. I’m still in the running for exemptions and I DO NOT want to mess that up. To my classmate who occasionally reads this blog, seems to have everything in life super organized, and is sort of really great at said subject, I would very much appreciate it if you could help me. You’re the best!

And amidst all the stuff I need to do, thoughts of you are still somewhere lurking inside my mind. I don’t think of you as often as I used to which is great and I’m immersing myself in other things, too.

I wish I could write about how I feel about you as easy as I write about other things. I wish I could just pour all these feelings and make something creative, like a short story or poem, instead of getting stuck with them alone inside my head. I wish there’d be a systematic and logical way to solve this kind of problem as soon as possible.

But shooting stars don’t exist and I still sort of slightly miss you.

I’m trying to be as casual as I can in chat and in person, so please let me be in my own personal blog.

BESIDES, there are plenty of other things I’d wish for, given the chance (e.g. academic excellence, physical fitness, world peace) so no worries.

Life is as hard as it is beautiful.

I need to study for my exam tomorrow *insert crying emoji here*. Till’ next time! ❤

Update: I FINISHED THE EXAM BEFORE THE END OF OUR CLASS AND GOT  TO REVIEW MY ANSWERS! I DON’T GET TO DO THAT OFTEN IN COLLEGE SO YAY!! ❤

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE

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P.S.

Rest in peace, Stephen Hawking..

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(c) The Big Bang Theory Facebook page

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ALSO

HAPPY PI DAY!!

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