I’ve been in this world for only a mere 17 years, so I’d say that I’m still an amateur and I still have a lot of things to learn, but simply because I want to share with you a few of what I’ve learned over the years and because I want to remind myself every now and then, I’ll be writing this post about Friendship.
First of all, there’s nothing wrong about being friendly and kind to everyone. If you’re just not that type of person, then I understand, but if you just don’t know how to be social, then this is a pretty good start. I mean, HA, I don’t know very much about being social either, but for me, it’s just a natural thing to treat everyone nicely. I don’t know what they’re going through with life and such, so instead of troubling them more, wouldn’t it be better to lend them a hand or a shoulder?
If you’re trying to be more social, you’re going to have to make an effort to actually socialize with people. I don’t really know how to do this, too, but just try initiating a conversation with people (you can start with the people who you usually see, such as your classmates, block mates, club mates, and org mates) by saying “hello” or something that the both of you (or all of you, if you’re talking to a group) would know. I suggest you initiate a conversation with a person or people who aren’t already in a conversation though, so that you’d be heard because at times they’re already too caught up in their conversation to notice you or listen to what you have to say. If you think you know what they’re talking about though, feel free to try to join the conversation.
When you’re with a person or a group of persons, make sure that you feel comfortable hanging out with them. Sometimes, we tend to change ourselves a bit in order to fit in with people. I don’t know about you but that’s just tiring. I don’t want to keep up a facade just so that I’d fit in with a group of people. There’s plenty of other people who might be okay with me. I just haven’t found them yet. So, I’m sure that there are people who have the same interests as you and accept you just the way you are, no pretending or shit.
Also, you’ve got to know the friends that are worth keeping. I don’t mean cutting ties with those who you don’t mix well with, rather, I mean it’s good to have plenty of friends, but a person should know who his/her true friends are and make an effort to keep in touch with them. It’s like focusing on those who really care for you and, in return, whom you care for, too. Treasure those kind of people because, in this world, not many people will truly care for you, besides your family, so having the right companions will avoid those depressing and lonely moments. It’s them you go to when you need someone to talk to and they’ll find the means to talk to you, be it through chat, telephone, or in person. And of course it’s a given that you have fun when you’re with them because, despite your differences and busy schedules, you just connect somehow.
And though you may not talk as much anymore, acknowledging an old friend once and a while will certainly do you good. Personally, it’s always nice to catch up with someone whom you haven’t talked to in quite a long time. And you can walk through memory lane together, too. If things didn’t end to well between you guys in the past, it’s better to not keep grudges and just move on with your life. It’s exhausting to be angry at someone and holding on to that anger won’t do you any good. Just let go. Trust me.
If you’re the friend who’s always forgotten and who’s always left alone in the end, I kinda know how it feels and let me tell you, it sucks BIG TIME. Like, you guys used to talk all night and tell each other everything, from crushes to real life problems, from favorites to what annoys the shit out of you. Then, they meet other people. That is where the shit begins.
Well, I know it’s hard to cope when you’re friend, the one who you thought would always be by your side, leaves you for another group of friends. As much as you try to keep up with him/her, you never do. Every time you see him/her, the past just rushes back to you and it hurts as fuck. But maybe, just maybe, you’re better off without him/her in your life. If she’s okay with leaving you behind means that (and this is gonna hurt) he/she doesn’t cherish you enough. And you don’t deserve less that what you’re worthy of. I am telling you that you are going to meet people who are going to see you for the beautiful person that you are, accepting all your flaws and weaknesses. Though, you should still be civilized with that friend that left you though. At least, even for a short time, you guys shared a bond that made you happy and that made you grow as a person.
I admit that I still don’t know much about friends, about life, about everything. There are a lot of things I have yet to learn. But, though I wouldn’t say that I went through that much drama in high school, I’ve gained knowledge from my experiences, including the stupid, childish and dramatic ones (to hell with those please!). I’ve lost friends because I didn’t treasure them properly and because I’d started immature fights. And I’ve also been the friend who’s been left and forgotten. Point is, I think I’ve grown and I’ve become a more mature person, to some degree, so I don’t want to make the same stupid mistakes and lose more friends and watch more opportunities to make new friends pass by.
Personally, I think friendship is a form of love and taking care of it would cause great a person great joy. 🙂
If you’re a friend (or former friend) who I didn’t treasure properly or a former friend who has left and forgotten me, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for my shortcomings as a friend. I’m still learning how to be better at these things. If you think you need to leave, I’ll let you go. You deserve better. But if, despite that, you’re willing to stay, thank you. Thank you so much. :’)
LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE